Pinterest Princess, Holiday Edition

I am as guilty as the next one. You know who you are; lunch breaks spent “pinning,” your dream kitchen has it’s own board, and you’d do just about anything to get your hands on a Michael’s coupon.

Since the summer, I too, have joined the world of Pinterest. No mason jar is safe, no surface I can’t chalkboard paint!

So in the spirit of the holiday season – and with the courage of a few DIY pins – I took to the notion that I would create a ornament wreath for my front door.

Enter the glue gun. Me and my trusty (and VERY hot) sidekick were plugged in and ready. First, I threw a freshly dry cleaned shirt on the bed and stole borrowed the hanger. Metal hangers rock! Leaving the twisty part alone, I bent the main frame until it resembled a circle. Then, I untwisted the metal just below the curved hanger. Careful, my advice is to use pliers and possibly the closest body builder available. Yes, I poked my finger a few times and the metal isn’t quite as easy to manipulate as I thought.

Then it was time to decorate. I had an old plastic tub of a collection of Christmas ornaments that had been hodge-podged together over the years and several were missing or broken. Reminder: you will want to make sure that the ornaments are different sizes and colors so that you get a nice full effect to your wreath.

Before you begin to “string” your ornaments, gently lift the metal top and apply a few dots of hot glue. then firmly press the top back on. You can opt out of this step, but as I learned the hard way after stringing half the ornaments, the weight of the wreath will cause them to fall and possibly break. Better safe then sorry.

When placing your ornaments on the wire, alternate sizes and colors. Be sure to nest each ornament so that the wreath is full and you cannot see any of the wire. I placed a few in the middle and then worked from both side wot fill the wreath. This was the easiest way for me to make sure that the wreath stayed balanced in ornament size and color.

Once the wreath is full, simply twist the metal back together at the top and reshape the hook if needed. I finished mine off with a threading of bright gold ribbon to hide the hook.

It’s been a good year

Has it really been a year?!

Reflecting on the fact that it has been almost exactly one year since my last post (gasp!), I have decided to attempt to recap the entirety of highlights from 2011 – it’s been a good year.  Oh, and I’m gonna do it in a third person narrative.

*Insert that catchy little ESPN highlight jingle here*

When we last left Carrie, January 2010, she was waddling around nearly seven months pregnant and completely in denial that knee-high brown leather boots with 4″ heels was not the appropriate footwear to be wearing.

Kidding, I seriously couldn’t keep that up the whole post!

The early months of 2011 were spent on newborn retail acquisitions, moving into a new home, and eating french fries in obscene quantities.

BBB (Beautiful Baby Boy) arrived in mid April 2011 – not without a dramatic entrance.  For the next 8 weeks, I went offline, un-blowdried, and under 3″.

Returning to work in mid-June brought on a whole host of new challenges, errr, I mean opprtunites to reafirm just how little sleep one person can function on.  Back in the saddle of work/life balance, I was in for the ride of my life.  It may be taboo to say, but I was actually looking forward to getting back to work, to adult interaction, and to seven reasons a week to wear heels.

Every morning was spent kissing BBB goodbye before sunrise….

…. and arriving home in time to smother him with more smooches before he went to sleep for the night.  Yes, you read that correctly (caution: mom brag), BBB slept through the night starting at 9 weeks!

The summer went by fast – a blur of play dates, working weekends, and watching BBB grow and grow.

We went to the zoo and saw bears

When Fall came, the fun continued.

We picked apples at Apple Hill

We hunted for pumpkins at the pumpkin patch

It was an adventurous Summer and Fall – for the whole family. DD started a new job; I have taken the jump into 1099 services for interactive media, blog, and marketing as side work; and BBB just continues to grow, discover, and amaze everyday.

Here we are, the verge of December 2011, and it’s safe to say…. it’s been a good year.

Puddle Jumping

“Let the rain kiss you. Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops. Let the rain sing you a lullaby. ”
– Langston Hughes

This past weekend was prime conditions for a favorite Winter past time of mine …. jumping in puddles!

I awoke to the rhythmic thumping sound on my roof and a smile immediately spread wide across my face.  I sprang to the window …. YES!!!

I threw on an old pair of jeans, a coat, and my oh so FABULOUS POLKA DOT RAIN BOOTS. Quickly I glanced around to see if Oliver was ready to go too – surely my frantic speech rate and giddy tone had his tail wagging. “Oliver,” I shouted, “Let’s go, time for a walk.”

Ummm…hello?!

Unsolicited offer of a walk …. nothing.  He might have raised an eyebrow.

Ok, so not so much.  Let’s just say that Mr. O doesn’t exactly share my enthusiasm for rain, or mornings, or anything not involving 70 degree temps and a pillow.

Enough about that, puddles were rapidly forming and I could already feel the cool splash creeping up my legs. Out the door I fled.

It was joyous!

The rain was still pouring down, slapping me in the face with every leap. I gave myself a 6 on quality of puddles found, and an 8 for distance.

I can hardly wait until the next rainy weekend day.  I plan to do it up even bigger – a little singin’, a little dancin’.

 

Truemors and Frenemies

Lingo, slang, jargon … I’m hip with it all. I consider myself to be well versed in most of the vernacular switch-a-roos that people use these days; until yesterday. “Frenemy?” “Truemor?” 

Indulge me… 

Initially upon hearing these, I had a School House Rock flash back.  “Conjunction junction, what’s your function” (it’s ok that you just sang along). Still, was I correct to assume literal translation? O, I hope so. Audible excitement factor is registering at about a 8.7 right now. Must. Inquire. Further. I knew exactly where to consult, dear Urban Dictionary search function.

	Truemor:
	A rumour that is true.   Person 1: Did you hear the rumour above Dave? Person 2: Having sex with a fat chick in a tent? Person 1: Yeah. Person 2: Oh, that’s a truemor.

	Frenemy:
	someone who you pretend to like but really you both know you hate each other..   Person 1: That girl’s is my frenemy. I hate that stupid ho!

 

OMG, IDK, WTF created these?! LOL! Sooo perf!

I am taking every opportunity possible to use abuse these new additions to my vocabulary – you’ve been warned. LOVES IT!

Oliver vs. PETCO

What I should have read BEFORE last night’s PETCO visit … AND, how it all really went down 

“Visiting a pet store does not mean you have to act like an animal. Treat the pets and the employees with respect and dignity. If your behavior is loud and obnoxious, the pets and the employees will want you out of the store. Follow these steps to learn how to behave appropriately” – eHow.com, ‘How to Behave in a Pet Store’ 

“Visiting a pet store does not mean you have to act like an animal, but it helps if you use that mentality.  Make sure to treat other animals and customers as if they could, at any given moment, attack.  Speak firmly and with emphatic tones, stopping just short of 4-letter words, so they know your serious about not switching to IAMS.  Follow these steps to ensure your trip is a productive one” – Carrie, “Oliver’s other end of the leash” 

Rule 1: Refrain from yelling or talking loudly as this might frighten the pets. Behave in a calm and gentle manner… Flag down employees by using several hand gestures and a volume of speech similar to that of hailing a NYC cab.

Rule 2: Keep your fingers out of the cages or aquariums. The animals might bite you. You could also make the animals sick from germs or chemicals on your hands… How else are you supposed to touch those little kittens on adoption day?! 

Rule 3: Observe the fish nicely. Tapping or knocking on the fish aquariums is a no-no…BUT, pressing your face up to the glass and puffing out your cheeks is the best method for finding Nemo.  They won’t actually ask you to stop until the third time you do it anyways.

Rule 4: Ask for permission before giving anything to an animal. Feeding the pets is usually not allowed unless supervised by a store employee…So then those treat bowls at the check-out counter aren’t self-serve?!  Oliver is just going take the treat and run, good luck “supervising.”

**This entire outing lasted 9 miuntes.

Dear Lady Gaga

Joe and Ryan, close your browser now … this will not end well for either of you. This post was inspired by both of your love for the Gaga along with many website letters I’ve read and my ever increasing need to scrutinize the famous.

Now…

Dear Ms. Ga (I’m not in to the whole brevity thing)

After careful observation and a series of calculations made using the Lady Gaga math formula: (RAH)² (AH)³ + [ROMA (1+MA)] + (GA)² + (OOH)(LA)²  – I am writing to you to express the following:

When your Poker Face burst on to the scene you enraptured attention spans, you weren’t a Miley or a Britney; you had talent! You could play instruments and given a bucket, carry a tune. 

Your embrace of eccentric musical genius rivaled that of a luncheon with Elton John and Boy George. You had costumes; salacious everyday costumes.  The piquancy of that pink spandex pencil skirt… Gimmie more!  Hair doughnut? Second helping of gusto, please!

**side note: I love your “no pants” pants. Whenever those are for sale, I need to get them**

But now I just think you’re getting ahead of yourself. 

First, congrats on the second album and I promise not to mention the rampant rumors of eerily like-sounding tracks. (Hint: call LaFace and get to work)

And that thing you wore during the dance sequence of your newest video, you know, that leotard/flamenco dress…well, hmmmm. 

There are few questions weighing on my mind, hoping you can offer answers. What exactly IS a disco stick? is there an initiation process involved in becoming a “monster”? What elements do you feel make the perfect poker face? 

Additionally I have a bone to pick with you regarding appearances.  No matter how daring or provocative you may hope to be, you still make appearances on Ellen – the first lady of controversy?

At the very least let’s think about the word, “overexposure”, I know, it seems like in the wake of Beyonce it isn’t possible, but trust me, it is.

In conclusion, I hope that the hotel tryst with Angelia rumors are true; way to trade up!

 Sincerely,

 Carried Away

Cherry Popping!

Hello and welcome to my first EVER blog!

This just in…stay tuned!